I made a lot of mistakes with Axel. It's hard to admit. Especially, since I put so much time and thought into preparing my life for him. I planned every bit out so that I could fit everything around adding this new dream dog into my life. Axel was between 8 and 9 weeks old when I picked him up. I planned to fly him home in the cabin on the airplane, but that was the first thing that had to change. He was 23 lbs! Too big for the cabin. So he had to fly underneath. I still remember hearing him cry from underneath even while we were flying! :(
As we went through the first few critical months together, turns out I was totally clueless on how to meet his needs. I had had plenty of dog and puppy exposure before, but nothing like this. A real, raw, farm boy of a dog in a white, sterile, noisy sort of apartment environment. Naive or ignorant, I will claim both. I didn't know what it would do to raise this boy outside of the farm.
The outcome was a lot of confusion and a lot of hurt for us both. We were exposed to all types of training; both positive and negative. And as our relationship dynamic grew, I finally had to make a choice. Axel wanted to be with me, but he was not happy. I could not keep torturing him in the city. I rehomed at 2 years and 4 months old after spending nearly $10,000 on effort to make our life together work.
I miss him dearly. But what I take away is a larger perspective on dog needs than I ever could have imagined. He blessed me with the task of untraining myself and learning a new way. I love him forever.
